Thanks for giving us a perspective of where you are coming from.
The RAV4 has econocar roots of a simple strut based suspension. It's not going to measure up to the dynamic qualities of any of your previous rides.
That said, it doesn't mean it can't be made better. Hopefully with minimal trade-offs. I've toyed with many cars in my years, having tracked many of them with modified coilovers, revised suspension geometry, arms, etc.
I'd re-iterate that the best thing you can do is to shod it with more performance oriented tires. This will go a long long ways to getting more grip and handling performance all around - even at the stock tire sizes. Though widening and going lower profile as I suggested would surely improve on that one more step again, with more acceleration to boot cause of slightly better overall gearing. Very little trade-off with either suggestion here.
The next step would be to source a stiffer rear anti-roll bar. This will attempt to dial out a lot of over steer present in the suspension tuning. Though I would due this only after assessing how the chassis likes the added traction from the steps above. Again, minimal if any trade-off here.
You can find some performance in alignment as well. The RAV likely doesn't have much if any camber dialed in, which is why it probably gives up front end traction so easily. Though many strut based case don't have any provisions to dial in more camber so this may not even be a possibility.
I wouldn't look to aftermarket springs/shocks first though as IMO, there's plenty of spring rate and dampening already.
